Friends, can we share a moment together? Pull up a comfy chair and lean in close because I want to share my heart with you. I keep seeing pictures pull through my Instagram and Facebook feed. Homes are decorated, lights are strung. Pictures of daily Advent devotionals are proving that you aren’t spiritual enough this December and everyone else’s kids are going to know more about the Bible than yours. The store holiday displays are adorned with amazing precision. Every commercial break, we see “mothers” in aprons making cookies, models posing as dads sheepishly dressed as Santa Claus, and couples sharing a kiss over a new engagement ring. Then there’s that darn Elf. Bless it, I love you my creative crafty friends but for the life of me I cannot fathom why you would want to wreck your house for the purposes of an impish doll and then have to turn around and clean up the mess. And then do it all over again tomorrow. I’m worn out simply thinking about it.
Are you thinking the same thing as I am? By January, we’re going to all need a long winter’s nap if we’re going to survive the race that the Christmas season can easily become.
We’re all striving to create this perfect Christmas experience. We long for the perfect Christmas card photo. We want to get the best deal on a gift that will take our kids’/husband’s/parents’ breath away. Then, we need to spend $35 and 45 minutes wrapping it until it is just-so. There are Christmas program clothes to press, stocking stuffers to purchase, a brunch to plan, and a white elephant gift you will end up buying because you just can’t find a piece of junk in your house that will quite fit the bill.
Don’t misunderstand me. I am no Grinch. I love Advent devotionals. I adore giving gifts. My tree twinkles off to my left tonight, fully decorated. You can do all of the above to enjoy your Christmas to its fullest. *You’re not going to sell me on any variety of the Elf though (even the Jesus centered, kind ones). I’m out on that one, friends.*
Or you can do none of the above.
Christmas isn’t about keeping up with one another. It’s not a grand contest of one-upmanship. No matter how hard you bake, decorate, gift, read, shop, plan, wrap, party you can’t win Christmas. It’s not a game.
So can we give each other a gift this December? Together, let’s give up the dream for the “perfect” Christmas. It simply doesn’t exist. Your life is not a commercial. Face the facts, this December you will forget to read a story to your child one evening. And that’s ok. Someone in your family might get a stomach bug. And that’s ok. You’ll botch a gift idea. And that’s ok. You won’t get your Christmas cards out on time. And that’s ok. Something is going to burn in your oven. And that’s ok. You’ll forget to buy a gift for the teacher. And that’s ok.
*Deep breath all together.*
In the end, our kids aren’t going to remember the gifts we gave, the foods they ate, the places they went, the books we read them, or even what that rascal of an elf did so much as they are our demeanor and the pace of our lives during the Christmas season.
Delight in your imperfection. For if it weren’t for your imperfection, there would be no need for God to send His one and only son to earth, the very reason why so many people all the world over celebrate Christmas. Our need to create the “perfect” Christmas is an idol. Instead of worshipping the Christ child sent to FREE the world from the entrapment of self, we deceive ourselves into thinking we can create something perfect from nothing. We focus in on that impossibility, believing this. is. the. year. it will be perfect. Then we chase our tails around in a crazy cycle that doesn’t break until January 2nd.
No one else’s Christmas is perfect either, no matter how wonderful their world looks on social media right now. In fact, many of the most beautiful photos have the most painful stories behind them. Handle everyone you meet with grace this Christmas season. Their load may be incredibly difficult, a ridiculous burden to bear. Don’t be afraid to share your own imperfections, too. Let others know that you’re delighting in the season but laying down the trappings that cause us to lose our focus on what truly matters.
The quest for perfection often causes us to miss the joy in the journey. Enjoy your Christmas, just as it is – messy, sweet, sticky, with crumbs all over the floor and flour in your hair. Soak up the moments that fill your heart with joy instead of mentally checking off your to do list. Weep in wonder. Pause in sweet moments with your children. Sing at the top of your lungs. Hug more people. Speak words of encouragement. Eat too many cookies. Say thank you way more than you need to.
There is no perfect Christmas. There is only this Christmas you’ve been given. Isn’t that wonderful?
Don’t forget to keep this year’s Debt Free Christmas promise!
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what a great sentiment! You hit the nail right on the head.
Aw, thanks so much Rebeca. It was a flood of a post that came out all at once. 🙂 Feeling burdened for those who think they aren’t doing “enough” when there really isn’t any such things as “enough.” 🙂
Yes, yes, yes! A thousand times yes! I love your line “you can’t win Christmas.” So true, but oh how we try. Sometimes I feel guilty because from the outside it can appear like I have it all together at Christmas. I bake a lot, I send out cards, we do gingerbread houses, my gifts are purchased. But. BUT. I start planning and doing many of the tasks in October. It’s the only way I manage to actually enjoy the holidays when the holidays are actually here. And the other really big BUT? I enjoy the planning and doing a little something here and there for months before Christmas. It makes my heart sing. The truth is that for most people, that isn’t the case. And that’s okay! Your Christmas isn’t any less special than mine, because it’s YOUR Christmas. I so agree, Cherie – it’s what your home feels like that counts. Does your family feel love? Are you together? Then you’re good. Thank you so much for the reminder we all need this time of year.
Thanks friend. There is such a temptation to live someone else’s story, or envy someone else’s position. It’s an age-old deceptive tale that causes us to fall over and over again. Believing that someone else has it better than us is a trap. Also, I need some Angie Six baked goods this Christmas. How shall we make it happen? 🙂
Angie’s cookie delivery service … I like it.
Great thoughts. I think we all need this reminder. Also, I don’t get the elf thing either. 🙂
Thanks friend! I was preaching to the choir. 🙂
Apparently I’ve been doing this just by ignoring the fact that Christmas is approaching. New family struggles this year mean everyone is flat our broke, and while none of us appreciate being broke, it’s actually allowed us to open our eyes to create new Christmas traditions. This year we’re setting a monetary limit on everyone. My parents are notorious for buying everything in the world for Christmas, so much so that you can’t fit another thing in my car for the ride home. While I appreciated their generosity and never asked for any of it, it always led to me feeling like I could never give enough back. So with the weight of that off my shoulders this year, so much stress has also left. Thanks for this post 😉
You are so lucky to get a handle on things while you’re so young friend. 🙂
you forgot that prompted this post. Did I prompt this post? Michael just called my blog a scroogefeast.
So your post pushed me over the edge but I was already noodling on this prior to reading your post. NOT a Scroogefeast, simply a reality check. You don’t HAVE to do all of that stuff to have a Merry Christmas.